March 5, 2009
For a Happier, Wealthier You, Purge the Unloved, Unwanted or Negative from Your Life
Dwelling on regrets or negative memories can often fuel depression, but clearing out tangible reminders of them can give you a welcome lift. For example, if a certain dress reminds you of a former, unhappy relationship, get rid of it. It may be beautiful and fit you like a glove, but it will always take you back emotionally to a negative place when you look at it. Other kinds of items that can induce negative/guilty feelings are all those magazines you've been saving that you can never find time to read; that vase Aunt Mary gave you that you don't really like or use; that sweater from your sister that just isn't your style, those photographs of your ex, etc. These items all end up being just so much clutter because they are neither loved, used or adding anything positive to your life. Most people have items that fit this bill. Unfortunately, they too often take them out, look at them and then put them right back where they were instead of making a decision about what to do with them. Since clutter is the result of postponed decision-making, you're creating clutter when you do this.
Think of it this way, no caring relative or friend would want you saddled with something you didn't love or use. Their intention was for the item to bring you pleasure and make your life a little better or nicer. If whatever they gave you isn't doing that, move it out of your space. You can sell it, donate it, give it away or re-gift it to someone you know would appreciate it. Don't feel guilty about it or use the guilt as an excuse not to make a decision and not to take action. The odds are there is someone else out there in the world who would love to have it and will make good use of it, so let it go.
The unwillingness to decide can cost you in other than emotional ways, too. U.S. self-storage gross revenues topped $22.1 billion in 2007. Yes, that's billion with a "B"! I have more than one client who pays to keep items they have been given or inherited in off-site storage. In one case, a client has been paying $100 a month for 5 years for a storage room in Maine containing items from her deceased parents' home. She lives in Manhattan and rarely gets to Maine. She says she can't even remember most of what's in the storage unit, yet she has already paid $6,000 - and counting - to warehouse whatever is in there. Another client has kept the belongings of her beloved, deceased partner in storage here in Manhattan for well over a decade and has no idea when or if she'll ever do anything with any of it. In discussing the cost of this storage room and doing the math with her, she was horrified to realize that she had already spent close to $25,000 to store his "stuff". She also admitted that her deceased partner would be horrified by the situation, if he knew. Imagine being able to put that money into your savings each month!
The truth is that the memories either live inside of you or they don't. If the memories that are generated are negative, why keep going there? Get rid of those items. If the memories are pleasant and positive, a reasonable, manageable quantity of memorabilia is understandable and sensible, but I think most of us would agree that endlessly paying for storage - unless you have bags of money and don't care what it costs - does not make sense, especially in these financially challenging times.
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MILLER ORGANIZING. All rights reserved.
14 Stuyvesant Oval
NYC, NY 10009